If not, you might fall off a 100 meter waterfall
Many of us are on edge because we’ve been pushed there by the opinions and perceptions of others about us.
Many of us are way down river, about to head over the 100 meter waterfall, because the current of our environments have out-powered our own motors.
If we live life in reaction to the people and circumstances around us, we will die by falling 100 meters down a proverbial waterfall. Or something like that.
One of the most, if not the most, difficult things today is to discriminate between the things that we feel and the things that we are. There is a massive difference.
The things that we feel, especially in relation to the people and circumstances around us, do not have to carry us, or our days, away.
Discriminate against everything that comes into your mind and heart. Is this for me or is this not for me. People are good at making you the cause for how they feel. All people, you and I do that to others too.
The way I feel is the way I feel. Yes, it could have been prompted by what someone said or did, but it’s still me that feels it.
And that simple fact is massively important.
The opinions, words, and actions of the people around me tell me about them, not about me.
The way I feel tells me something about me, not the people around me.
This does not mean that we should not listen to the people around us, or that we don’t need to hear the things they feel and say. Often, we do. We might need to hear about how something we said or did was hurtful to them.
But then we must choose what to do with this information. If I listen, discriminate and then choose to act on this information by changing something about what I say or do, then I am living in a healthy way.
The point is that it is my choice. I am acting on my own volition, not being carried away by the winds of my environment.
If you do not discriminate against the opinions, words, and actions of the people around you, they will control you.
Sooner or later, all you will do is react to stimuli around you. There will be no you. Only a little alarm that won’t stop *beeping* and a voice complaining about how you got carried away so far.
There is the real you and then there are the things that happen in your environment. If you discriminate between what is the truth of who you are and what is your current experience of the things around you, you will be able to remain in place and at peace even in the most difficult situations.
For example, if you don’t like this post…
I could react to your words and start letting them seep deep down into my soul — playing on repeat. I could decide that I am not good at this, I should not do this. It’s not worth it. And then quit.
I could acknowledge that you don’t like this and ask you if you have any input you’d like to give. Period.
In the first example, I don’t discriminate against your experience and opinion. I receive it as the eternal truth. I let it carry me wherever it will.
In the second example, I discriminate and label it as your opinion and your experience. This is just simply the truth. The fact that you do not like this post says something about your taste, not necessarily about whether it is valuable to someone or whether simply the act of writing it was the goal.
You see, the key is to discriminate.
Is this thing the truth of who I am and the truth of my motive or is it simply the swirling winds of the environment that I inhabit?
The winds won’t help me if I always just let them carry me away.
This is my daily project where I write about diverse ideas.
This is ‘Dose’ #11.